Archive for category Writing
How keeping a journal can help with understanding yourself
Posted by David C. Buchan in Getting Things Done, Writing on May 15th, 2009
Reading time: 2 – 4 minutes
A few days ago I wrote on the last page in my moleskine journal. It took me 10½ months to write on each of the 240 pages. The journal is a record of my internal thinking over that period and I’d like to share with you some of what I learnt about the writing process along the way.
- The more frequently you write, the better the conversations you have with yourself. In past years I’ve been called to write in a journal infrequently; usually only when I had a particularly nasty problem on my mind. Recently I’ve found myself needing to visit my journal every two or three days because I now benefit from a regular outpouring of ideas and my associated comfort level has shifted. I typically write at the start of the day. In the evening before bed I’m too tired to delve into it yet some nights I find myself writing in the wee small hours of the morning to get an idea out of my head so that I can sleep.
- Write what you think and feel as well as what you do. I do note important events in my journal as I consider it a historical record yet most of the benefit comes from writing what I feel and believe rather than transcribing my day’s actions (of course thinking and feeling are actions in themselves).
- Questions are a good source of things to write about. My output really kicked off when I was given a list of 50 self-inquiry questions to consider. I committed to answer all 50 in 50 days which in itself was a lot of fun to do and a fantastic goal to achieve. Many books on self-improvement contain questions to ask of yourself and these can be a great source of inquiry. I frequently found I was surprised by my answers.
- A journal is aplace you can be honest. When open to the process I would write a description of what was on the surface and listen for the deeper thought behind it. More often than not I would be in wonder at identifying what I was really thinking. These thoughts were the doorways to different ideas and actions.
- Get a good pen and paper. Moleskine notebooks are nice to write in. I use a 240 page, unlined version to let me draw pictures if I need to. I also prefer to write with a fountain pen. Why? Simply because I enjoy the feel of the ink across the paper and I’m doing something special for myself so why not have special tools as well.
This morning I started a new journal with a mood of wonder at where it will take me in the coming months.
Update: Arbhay Parvate tweeted me after he recognised journalling was a way of clearing out open loops at higher levels of GTD focus. I hadn’t realised this myself and it certainly provides an explanation for why it has become such an enjoyable and useful experience.
A week with Paulo Coehlo teaches the importance of meaning
Posted by David C. Buchan in Inspiration and motivation, Writing on May 14th, 2009
Reading time: 1 – 2 minutes
No, I haven’t been lucky enough to spend a week with author Paulo Coehlo personally yet in a way I have. In his most recent Warrior of the Light newsletter he has shared a week’s worth of experiences with his readers.
Sometimes readers complain that I say very little about my private life in this column. I do talk a lot – mostly about my questionings in the imaginary world. They insist: “but what’s your life like?” Well, then, for a whole week I went out with a notebook and jotted down more or less what happens in seven days. Paulo Coehlo
Facebook, Twitter and all other types of social media allow us the opportunity to share our lives with others in small snippets. This article could just have easily been done using any of those methods or via blog entries, yet what makes it stand out for me is the meaning exhibited. Paulo’s observations are much more than what he did. They are how he felt about what he did and that makes for a much more engaging read.
What would you learn about yourself if you were to undertake such an exercise? What would your friends and family learn about you? Would you find more meaning in life if you sought it in the experiences you already have?
If You Don’t Affirm Yourself Now, You’ll Hate Yourself Later
Posted by David C. Buchan in Inspiration and motivation, Self improvement, Writing on April 29th, 2009
Reading time: 4 – 6 minutes
“I can’t do it”, “Why would they listen to me?”, “I am not important”.
Do statements such as these make you feel empowered to take on the world or empowered to crawl into a hole? For some reason our minds seem wired to bring us down. So many people exhibit the poor little old me syndrome that it must be true. Or maybe it isn’t. Perhaps they’ve not learned to do anything differently.
It has taken me many years to accept the power of affirmations. In this, the third in a series of articles on stress management explaining the simple and practical ways in which you can reduce stress in your life to a level that you can then do something positive about it, I hope to help you accept them as well. Yesterday we covered a couple of little known ways to eliminate stressful thinking. How did you go?
Affirming affirmations
Affirmations are powerful and simple. Perhaps too simple for us to take seriously. I used to think it wasn’t possible for mere positive words to have such an effect on my life. Now I know differently. It took some time and practice — affirming yourself is a skill like any other — and eventually I felt my self confidence begin to rise. Sure, I still have bad days but the base level, or the water table so to speak, is now much higher and I can recover quicker.
An affirmation is a positive statement about oneself designed to encourage. If you’ve ever travelled on London’s Underground in the afternoon rush hour you can often find yourself held upright by the passengers around you. Affirmations are like that in the sense that they surround and support you.
For an affirmation to work my experience has shown me:
- It must be personal; Although you should start with a list of affirmations to see what is possible, those which work best are those which come from within you. I may suggest “I am of good character” but if character is not important to you the affirmation will be of little benefit.
- It must be in current tense; Not “I will be of good character” but “I am of good character”. If you were to affirm another’s beauty you say, “You are beautiful today” and not “You will be beautiful today”. My affirmations are riddled with “am”, “is”, “have” type words.
- It must be regular; Read your affirmations at least twice a day, preferably in a quite space. If you find yourself not believing what you are saying then stop, choose to believe, and start again. This may often require you to shift your posture to something more upright and balanced. Put them in your phone, on your iPod, taped to your bathroom mirror; whatever ensures you will read them.
Building a list of affirmations
Where to start? I suggest you take a look at my daily affirmations and take whatever sounds right to you. This list is updated with my most current set of affirmations designed to take me where I currently need to go.
Another excellent resource for affirmations and related meditations is Stin Hansen’s My Thought Coach website. Not only does she have a great article on the importance of thoughts Stin provides a large number of recordings which you can access via subscription (pricing is extremely reasonable and there are free samples for you to try first). My favourites are:
- Full Potential Self Meditation
- Gratitude Affirmations
- Affirmations for Social Confidence
- Affirmations for Attracting an Abundant Life
- Affirmations for Dealing with Difficult People at Work
- Think Like A . . .Loving and Happily Married Person
Music that moves you
While you’ve got your iPod out listening to Stin’s affirmations you may also want to load it with some music to help you shift your mood. Often we can find ourselves in a mood which doesn’t suit what we are trying to achieve and we would like to shift it to a more beneficial mood. One powerful way of doing this is reconnecting with music that takes us to where we want to be. For more information see my previous article, Music That Moves You.
Tomorrow: How to make time to relax.
Little known ways to eliminate stressful thinking
Posted by David C. Buchan in Getting Things Done, Self improvement, Writing on April 28th, 2009
Reading time: 3 – 4 minutes
If your body is tense you can massage it into relaxation. What if your mind is tense? How do you relax that?
It is possible to eliminate stressful thinking and massage your mind into relaxation. This is the second in a series of articles on stress management explaining the simple and practical ways in which you can reduce stress in your life to a level that you can then do something positive about it. Yesterday we covered ways to eliminate sources of unwarranted stress. How did you go?
Journalling creates paths forward
We do not realise how accelerated the rate of our lives has become, or the speed at which we are driving ourselves. Many people are destroying their physical bodies by this pace, but what is even more tragic, they are tearing their minds and souls to shreds as well.
Norman V. Peale, The Power of Positive Thinking (Bungay, Suffolk: Richard Clay (The Chaucer Press) 1984), p.96.
I am quite capable of carrying a lot of stressful thoughts around in my head. The moment when I scream inside is that very moment when my mind and soul tear. I no longer feel as capable as I was before. These are the moments when I most need to have a conversation with myself.
A mind tearing itself to shreds is not capable of having a conversation with itself. You just can’t hear yourself think over the stressful thoughts and as thinking occurs fast there is no chance to interrupt.
Writing your thoughts down is one way of breaking this cycle. I call it journalling and others will say writing in a diary. It doesn’t matter which. What is important is your willingness to pick up a pen and start writing what you are thinking. The lag between the two i.e., the difference in speed at which you think and write, is where the magic occurs.
I frequently journal my thoughts onto paper. Daily if I can, but always when I am stressed. It acts as a pressure valve to get what I really think onto paper and out of my head. Often it doesn’t matter what I write but that I have written something. As I write I listen for the real thoughts which now have space to surface. Each and every time I do this I learn something which provides a new path forward. With that my stress is reduced.
So instead of running or going to the gym to relieve stress, take out a pen and exercise with that instead.
The three-fold nature of work
David Allen’s Getting Things Done methodology describes a three-fold nature of work. Stress can come from being imbalanced across the areas. Take a look and see where your balance lies.
- Doing pre-defined work: This is choosing from what is already on your to-do list and calendar
- Doing work as it appears: Responding to the latest, loudest and new opportunities
- Defining work: Working out what is important, scheduling etc.
If you are stressed it is likely you are working too much in one area or you have conflicts between areas which you are not adequately handling.
Tomorrow: If You Don’t Affirm Yourself Now, You’ll Hate Yourself Later
What makes a good, clear book referral
Posted by David C. Buchan in Writing on April 28th, 2006
Reading time: 1 – 2 minutes
Clarity is always important. Megan Casey over at SquidBlog provides a great tip and example of how clarity can enhance a book referral. If you read it and apply the principles, you can see how you can expand your blog linking as well. If you network, the same applies there as well when describing ideal clients to others and how you would like them to introduce you in your absence.
P.S. So, what makes a good recommendation?
1. First-person experience.
2. Enthusiasm.
3. Specificity.
4. Sincerity.
5. Clarity.The difference between good (action-inducing) and bad (zzzzzz) recommendation is the difference between one person saying:
“I’’ve read a lot of history books, but this is the best I’ve ever found on the Roman Empire, and if you read it you will have a firm grasp on Roman history and architecture and I guarantee you’ll be booking the next flight to Italy.”
and the other saying,
“I guess I liked this novel, but you probably won’t.”
Which book would you buy?
Reflections on why I blog
Posted by David C. Buchan in Quantum Gardener, Writing on August 20th, 2005
Reading time: 2 – 3 minutes
I return to Quantum Gardener today without a clear idea of what I’m going to do with the site. Since early 2002 I’ve been blogging in one form or another. Probably longer if you consider buch@n which was started during 1999 when my wife and I were in London.
Blogging has brought contact with some wonderful people and greatly expanded my worldview. If I wasn’t writing myself I don’t believe that I would have connected so strongly. Blogging is a personal medium and I’m grateful to know there are people behind the words.
One of the questions I ask myself often is “for the sake of what?” which is a fancy way of saying “why?”. For what purpose do I blog? Originally it started as a way to share my thoughts, ideas and web resources on the topic of knowledge management. Following a redundancy from Andersen I was trying to start my own knowledge management business and blogging gave me a way to sharpen my thinking and a purpose to research. It was also part of my personal knowledge management strategy. When my focus changed to coaching the relevance of blogging about knowledge management faded and so I created this blog to help facilitate my learning (and again to share what I had learnt). buch@n too, had a singluar purpose—that of keeping my Australian family and friends up to date with my time in London.
Three blogs with three discrete and narrowly defined purposes. I think that’s the problem. I exist in much more than three dimensions.
I enjoy writing entries such as this. They are much more conversational and rambling. A deeper insight into who I am and what I really think. A greater freedom. The alternative is to write crafted entries with a distinct purpose and audience in mind. As I reflect I don’t think that’s the way blogs work. You may use blogging technology to help manage short articles but it’s not a blog. Crossing between the two is difficult and quickly results in nothing being written.
Perhaps this post itself is a declaration of how I plan to continue with Quantum Gardener even if I didn’t know it when I started. I’ve been here before and I know intuitively it’s the right way for me to proceed.
Pointers on Motivation
Posted by David C. Buchan in Inspiration and motivation, Miscellaneous, Self improvement, Writing on March 16th, 2005
Reading time: 4 – 6 minutes
A student recently wrote a letter to my local paper seeking advice on motivation.
My life is at a turning point; I’ve finished VCE [Year 12] and am now faced with the question of what I want to do with my life…I’m interested to find out what people do to get, and stay, motivated. I want to know the secrets to survival in the real world, outside learning institutions…I have asked my family and friend and am now throwing the question out to the wider community.
I think these are important questions. As Jessica’s letter was public, so is my reply.
Dear Jessica,
As my calling is the cultivation of the potential in people I was gladdened to see your letter in last Thursday’s Advertiser. I hope that you have received some good replies.
Relax. I think you’ll be fine. To write a letter such as you did tells me that you are aware of your own situation and limitations enough to take action to address them.
Asking your family and friends, then the world is a smart move. Continue asking as many people as you can for assistance with all aspects of life. They will give you opinions, advice and information you don’t have. Take it all and make your own decisions.
I believe motivation comes from within. Make time to sit and listen to your thoughts and emotions. Then have the conviction to follow them. A good book is True Success: A New Philosophy of Excellence by Tom Morris. He writes of 7 C’s of Success.
1. A clear CONCEPTION of what we want, a vivid vision, a goal clearly imagined.
The mistake here is to get trapped by the goal setting standard that it must all be written down and articulated. Sometimes this can only be felt. Part intuition, part faith. At times just an inkling which can barely be heard over the noise of everyday life. It may take years to develop. That’s ok as it will be all the stronger when you find it. At the end of your schooling you will be under a lot of pressure to select a career. Do what feels right now. You and the world will change and new careers will present themselves.
2. A strong CONFIDENCE that we can attain the goal.
You have all the skills you need. You have a demonstrated capacity to learn. Now you need to learn about yourself in the world, not just the world outside of you.
3. A focused CONCENTRATION on what it takes to reach the goal.
Keep your goal in your head and the way will show itself. Be imaginative and bold. At times you will say to yourself, “No, I can’t possibly do that.” You will find a way. There are always several. Continue to involve your family and friends. Look for solutions to problems.
4. A stubbon CONSISTENCY in pursuing our vision.
Keep at it.
5. An emotional COMMITMENT to the importance of what we are doing.
Our emotions drive what we see as possible. If you are emotionally committed (and what that means to you only you can know) then the possibilities you need will remain open.
6. A good CHARACTER to guide us and keep us on a proper course.
Integrity and respect (for yourself and others) will keep you moving forward. They will also attract assistance from others.
7. A CAPACITY TO ENJOY the process along the way.
Life is a journey. You only get to do it once.
These are some priciples to think about. Every time I’m really moving forward in life or achieving success all 7 are in play. When I’m not, at least one is missing. Another list is the Manual for Climbing Mountains by Paulo Coehlo.
The world you have grown up in has a strong bias towards technology and structured ways of doing things. Technology is a tool not an answer.
All we achieve in life is in partnership with others. Here conversation is the key. It gives support, knowledge and helps you with all the things you cannot do yourself. Learn about conversation as a technology itself. It is the key to greater learning.
Develop the skill of listening. I recommend you obtain a copy of Listening Leaders: The Ten Golden Rules To Listen, Lead & Succeed by Lyman Steil and Richard Brommelje. It lays out a good framework to begin with.
Seek out mentors for all areas of life in which you need to develop. Mentors come in many forms. People (good mentors and “I don’t want to be like them” mentors) and books. I recommend any of the books listed on my website.
Start a journal or a weblog. The act of writing will greatly clarify your thinking.
Every success,
David
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Charter for Compassion
